Look Up.

Last night was...profound.

A small group of my friends and I were able to meet with a couple whom we respect deeply and ask them questions about different things that were of concern to us. Most of us seemed interested in their views about future areas of service, places we might go, careers we might select, and how we might better serve the worldwide community. The gentleman spoke to us a lot about the fundamental issues that we might be overlooking which might actually be at the root of our questions. Specifically, it had to do with how much of ourselves we were willing to lend to the cause of the betterment of the world. Were we satisfied to be "good people"-- to pray, to go to activities, to be kind to others, etc., or were we willing to live our lives for a cause we believe in? To really dedicate ourselves to service. To sacrifice ourselves. He said both were good, but both were not the same. We had to find ourselves somewhere along that spectrum.

What he said that really moved me, and has had my mind spinning all night/morning, was that somewhere inside ourselves, somewhere in our very essence, we had to believe, we had to be confident that "you are not in charge of your life." He said, "the only real decision, I truly believe, that you will ever really need to make is 'Am I going to turn my life over to Him.'"

He definitely gave me something to chew on: my life isn't in my own hands. In some ways, it's so obvious. I mean I didn't choose to be born. I didn't choose my family. I didn't choose my appearance. I didn't choose when to get sick. I didn't choose my talents. I don't choose when to die. I don't choose who loves me. I don't choose who my children will be. The list goes on and on. But in some ways it just goes against everything that's pounded into your head from every direction.

Somewhere there is a balance.

We are not puppets. Certainly. But we can be guided. We have to actually seek the guidance, but it is there for us if we look for it. In the Sacred texts. In our own prayers and meditations. And if I needed any proof that we are not puppets (not that Ive ever for a second thought that way) my own life is proof of this. My own inability sometimes to follow the guidance that I think is being given to me because it doesn't necessarily conform to what I originally expected out of a situation. Those instances, when I've ignored what my gut was telling me, those are the few in my life I really regret.

He mentioned that his whole life consisted of walking through open doors. Relying on God to show him those open doors and then walking through them. And every blessing came from seeking and obeying. Acquiescing.

Total surrender.

It can be so hard, though. I know it can be hard... But I guess in a way it's also totally liberating. To really trust that the Creator of the universe, the source of all good, the source of all love, knowledge and perfections is in charge of my life if I submit myself to Him...how totally liberating. He knows everything, after all! I know little. Scratch that. I know nothing. So, it's a matter of ...tapping in. Aligning our wills with His.

His wife also said something really interesting regarding the notion of looking out for one's self and one's own interests. There's this popular idea, especially in the West that, "If I dont look out for myself, who else will?"

She mentioned that when people say "think for yourself" often the subtext is "think for your self-interest." And it's so true! We live in a world where we're all so busy being obsessed with ourselves. What I look like. What everyone else thinks of me. My good self esteem. My bad self esteem. My confidence. My lack of confidence. My this, my that.

He said, maybe the solution to low self esteem isn't high self esteem. Maybe the solution is not to esteem ourselves at all. He said, "stop looking at yourselves! Since when is pride a good thing? You shouldn't hate yourselves, either. But just, stop looking at yourselves. Look up. Look up." I loved that...I was so stirred by that.

What if we trusted more? What if we looked at the people and the world around us and forgot about ourselves a little more every day? How different might our lives, and as a consequence, our entire world be?

When things get too hard, just...look up.



"When a man turns his face to God he finds sunshine everywhere."


-Abdu'l-Baha, Paris Talks



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